HOORAY!!!!!! That's me.
I am completely and unapologetically sexually conscious and awake.. as opposed to being sexually-unconscious and asleep.
I think so many women are sexually unconscious... literally snoring through their sexual lives. They are not at all plugged into what makes them women and how they can enjoy the God-given right to have orgasms and be close to another human being. I do feel some are close to being conscious, but not close enough. Some are aware of their sexuality, yet unwilling to explore it. Others, whether through their life experiences such as abuse or bad sexual experiences, teachings, and other fears, are unable to perceive such consciousness as anything positive and are unwilling to think otherwise. This particular group makes me the saddest because their sexual views are often no fault of their own.
In my humble opinion, to be sexually-conscious has two parts... like a two-part test in the law.
The first part is having an awareness of one's surroundings, sensations, and thoughts before, during and after sex and every moment in between. You have to be alert to the fact such sexual vibrations exist for you and how you feel when they occur. Further, one has to want to be in the position to feel them... meaning THE WOMAN NEEDS TO WANT TO HAVE SEX AND FEEL SEXUAL!!! (Sorry.. hormones slipping out again.. it happens when I haven't masturbated for more than 48 hours).
I think a woman can possess Part One only and enjoy sex just fine. At least she can have orgasms and want to have sex in order to experience them. But I don't think that is enough, which is why I think there is a Part Two.
Part Two to being sexually conscious is the most ignored and unappreciated of the two parts.
Part Two is where a woman intentionally and deliberately involves herself in the sexual relationship with her lover and becomes a student of his needs. She is attentive and mindful of his needs and how they relate to that person as a sexual sexual being. She is aware of his changing needs. She is taking mental notes. She explores his boundaries. She helps him open up. She comforts him as his partner. She is his soft place to fall. She gives of herself - mind, body, and soul with the intent of loving him more and more each day. It is a daily commitment that takes dedication and energy.
I think some women are aware there is a Part Two, but don't really embrace it fully or recognize the power it brings in a relationship. Why is that?
This very test applies to men as well, but in this post, I am addressing women only...since I happen to be one... I think... let me check (smile).
Men.. I will get to you in a later post. Same test, different thoughts. Stay tuned..
For today, I have concluded that FH was sexually unconscious. In fact, he was probably darn near asexual. Still, sometimes I could see bits and pieces of a sexuality inside him. But the pieces refused to come out and play... no matter how much I pleaded with them to come and play with me (sigh). Did they hate me? Were they scared of me?
The best part is he is no longer my concern or worry. The worst part is I have no one to play with anymore.
Does anyone have any comments for this sexually-conscious and proud creature?
Let me have um!
Danica
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
8 comments:
Bravo!!!
Danica,
It is nice to see a woman who is so in tuned with her needs and sexuality. It is only right and just that you meet someone who is deserving of your company and companionship.
Mike:
Thank you for saying that. For a while, I felt being in touch with my needs was killing my marriage. Thank goodness I got a grip!
A Mere Man: Profound Intimacy.. I knew I was searching for what to call it.. thanks!
Zdg63: FINALLY! You came to say Hi! Yes, I suppose I am bearing my soul. EEK!!!!
Cardman: Awe.. come on and comment. PWEESE!!!! This post got you excited? My my.. you ain't seen nothing yet.
Danica
Well said Danica!!!
I'm sorry you have no one to play with anymore but you are a very sensual woman it's only a matter of time girlfriend before you're on your knees again and right as rain!
Hugs
Des
I think you nailed it right on the head! It is not enough to just do the physical you have to enjoy and recognize all aspects of your sexual being!!! WELL DONE!
Good read, I will be back for more for sure
Leela: You wish I have this soon??? Girl I wish I have this VERY VERY VERY SOON!!!! (sigh...)
Pantylines: Hello!!!!!! Gosh am I glad to see you. I loved your post yesterday. Simply fabulous!
Danica
PLay with me, play with me :-)
During my 13 years of marriage to someone that was hard to satisfy I had to really develope some good techniques for getting her to cum. The first few years I stummbled around trying to figure it out. She wouldn't tell me what to do. I eventually figured things ut on my own. I have never thanked her for this "training", but it has really benefitted me in my single life. But some blessing can also be a curse.
I am sort of a shy guy, so when I do get to the sex part of a relationship there tend to be 2 types of reactions I get from women I am with.
1) There is the "OMG that is amazing. How did you learn to do that" reaction. These are the times I privately thank my ex for. these tend to be the women that have had relatively healthy sexual experiences and are open and communicative about it before, during and after. You can dive right in and be as experimentive as possible from the get go.
2) But on the opposite side of this coin there is a different reaction. Far too many women have been in abusive, non-nuturing, or just selfish sexual relationships. The reaction I get from this type tends to be shock and fear. Not the kind of fear that they are afraid of me, but that they are freaked out because they are so unfamilar with letting themselves go.
I now try to understand what type a person is before we end up in bed. I don't want to freak anyone out :D
Jon:
You have all those amazing skills and you are shy? Really? Well.. you are the best kind! I fall in catagory number one by the way.
Late Starter:
Thank you for visiting. I hope you come back again. Yes.. there are plenty of women like me who are sexually awake and proud.. yet suffering. I will never be with another man who cannot talk to me about sex and be open with his needs. It is too important to me and to the relationship. I hope you get to see your friend soon. I am sure you miss her very much.
Danica
Post a Comment