Do men have body issues?
Are they as concerned about how they look in clothes as women are? Do they wonder how their partner feels about their naked body?
The answer may seem to be an obvious "Yes, Danica, we all do." However, in truth, I can see how the majority of men may never have body issues. Can't you? No? Let me explain...
In a 24-hour period, what influences or catalysts could possibly make a man think about his body or the imperfections he may have? My answer is very little. Any thoughts?
Flip the script.... in a 24-hour period, what influences or catalysts could make a woman think about her body or her imperfections? HUNDREDS!!!! From television commercials to clothing hanging in department stores...to the way lotion and body creams are marketed to "reduce cellulite" and "make skin shimmer through its anti-aging and lifting abilities", women are constantly being told "they need to be better and look better than they already do."
The reverse simply is not the case for men.
Men have to seek out the sources that might make them feel inadequate, less than or in "need of improvement." They have to buy copies of Men's Health magazine and the like, but even then, the cover of those circulars are worded differently. If they don't buy such material, they could go weeks or even months without such influences. And the Viagra and similar commercials don't count. Those are structured to help solve a problem for men and get them back in the intercourse game again. They help him feel better about his erection difficulties, not worse.
I get angry when I hear men complain and compare the bodies of women when they themselves could "use a little work." For example, picture this man I work with - balding horribly, sun damaged skin, horrible teeth, not the best dresser, overall not even presentable in a basic way. This man had the NERVE to talk about a woman in the building being sloppy with too small boobs and ugly legs! I wanted to knock his lights out! How dare he comment on her body and looks when he is not a stereotypical prize himself. I know beauty/attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder...and this man could be someone else's dream boat. Still, he really couldn't talk. But he did talk. He felt 100% OK about commenting as to how this woman was "less than attractive" and should "change some things."
Things like this happen daily where I work. It makes me sick.
I wish men would self-assess more and think about how they would feel if people were sizing them up all the time....wondering if they could perform well in bed...judging their bodies... and doing so openly.
Any men out there care to comment?
Let me hear from you.
Danica
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4 comments:
I don't like my fat stomach, but at the same time, find it hard to motivate myself to do anything about it.
I do try to buy clothes that disguise it
Hello Danica,
I just discovered your blog - and am glad I did! Great to get your perspective on being a dominant woman. As far as body image goes, most men could use a little work - and advise from women. I've written about how women and men present themselves on my blog: Yes, I'm a submissive man!
Respectfully,
-john
Hi Danica,
This is an old entry, but I will comment: I am a fit man, flat stomach, nice abs, lean and muscular but I was not always this way. I work at it (in service to my Mistress Wife) and I would never make any kind of disparaging comment about a woman's body.
The playing field in society is not that level: Men get away with walking around with huge bellies and flabby muscles, but women are expected to be rail-thin.
Best regards,
Thomas.
I disagree with some of that, men are judged every day, and they judged by women as to whether or not they will have the opportunity to have one of their primary physical needs met. Women may be judged just as harshly by most other women, but not by most men.
Any women however unattractive physically or psychologically, can find a man somewhere that will validate her in various ways if that is what she wants.
The problem is that only the "best" men appear on women's "radar". These men have options because they typically know their value. The other 90% of men will have to either have to beg, pay or go without.
I'm convinced that long term celibacy causes psychological problems for 99% of men that experience it.
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